Brenternet (The World as seen by Brent Moore)

Trying to appeal to the highest common denominator. I can't give you 110% effort, but I will give you 107.4% effort. If you're a spammer and leave me a comment, I will make fun of you. I use twice as many semicolons compared to most other bloggers

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Location: Smyrna, Tennessee, United States

As the title implies, I am Brent K. Moore. I married MariLynn Simons on Sept. 25, 1999. we attend Stewart's Creek Church of Christ. We have five pets, a dachshund, Slinkie, a malamute, Juno, and three rabbits, Ebunny and Ifurry, and now Houdini.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

15+ Albums that Changed my life

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Yee-haw.  It's going around MySpace and Facebook.
These aren't necessarily my all-time most listened to albums, but they all influenced me in one way or another

1) K-Tel compilation LP: Goofy Greats. This is some of the earliest music I listened to. K-Tel has always been known for making compilation records and this album was mostly novelty tracks from the late 60's. Songs included "Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini", "Beep Beep" "Mule Skinner Blues", "Bread and Butter", "Alley Oop", "Rockin Robin","Snoopy Vs. The Red Baron". I loved all those songs. One song scared me: "Surfin Bird" which was prominent in a recent family guy episode.

2) The Best of Emerson, Lake & Palmer
http://www.amazon.com/Best-Emerson-Lake-Palmer/dp/B00124T64O/
Growing up, I shared a room with my brother Scott. He bought his first CD player in the mid-to-late 80's and this was his first CD. I had to listen to whatever he was listening to, but when he wasn't home, I started playing this one. Now that I have most ELP albums, this Best of wasn't their best, but it got me hooked onto them. Favorie track: Karn Evil 9

3) The Best of Manhattan Transfer
http://www.amazon.com/Best-Manhattan-Transfer/dp/B000008I2X/
with a family of diverse musical tastes, this was the one thing we could all listen to. If music was playing at home, it was probably this one. When Scott and his wife moved to Tulsa and Dad, Mom and I went to visit, this cd was on repeat all night long in the background. Favorite track: Birdland

4) Beatles - White Album
http://www.amazon.com/Beatles-White-Album/dp/B000002UAX/
When Scott and his Cd player moved away, I needed something to listen to. I bought an 8-track player at a garage sale. At the time, I listened to Oldies 96.3 and was a fan of the beatles. I saw an 8-track called "the Beatles." I didn't recognize the cover or any of the song titles, and bought it. It turns out that the White Album doesn't say White Album on it anywhere, nor is the 8-track white. The 8-track was the 2nd album. My best friend and beatles expert David knew of it and dubbed the first album onto a cassette around 7th grade. Both got listened to a lot. After I got married, MariLynn bought me the CD. It's still my favorite Beatles album. Fav track: Birthday

5) Queen - News of the World
http://www.amazon.com/News-World-Queen/dp/B000000OAC/
After my brother Scott moved out, he left behind all of his cassettes dubbed off of LP. I didn't know who they were since I mostly knew "oldies". I listened to this and Queen has been my favorite band ever since. I asked my friends at school if any of them knew about Queen. I remember Joe Beard telling me their lead singer had just died of AIDS. My parents showed me Scott's LP collection where I found this. The front was really odd because it showed artwork of a robot killing the band. Fav track: We Will Rock You.

6) Electric Light Orchestra - Ole' E.L.O.
http://www.amazon.com/Ole-ELO-Electric-Light-Orchestra/dp/B0012GN2RY
I kept going through my brothers albums looking for other stuff I'd like and found this. Side note: Album artwork was far more important back in the days of LPs than it is now, You could do all this cool stuff with an album that the size limitations of a cd won't let you do. CDs sound better, though. This is a great greatest hits release before their sound changed and had more of a pop sound. Fav track: Kuiama.

7) Yes - Big Generator
http://www.amazon.com/Big-Generator-Yes/dp/B000002JLC/
I think this is the first album I ever purchased, as I bought the cassette at a mall on our schools infamous 8th grade trip to Washington, DC. Not their best album, but I liked it and have since got several more of their albums. While I was going through my LPs researching my list, I found I had this on LP, too and I don't remember ever buying it. Fav track: Shoot High, Aim Low.

8) Pink Floyd - The Wall
http://www.amazon.com/Wall-Deluxe-Packaging-Digitally-Remastered/dp/samples/B000006TRV/
Another of Scott's LPs dubbed onto Cassette. I listened to it over and over, but it took me a while to realize it was a double album. I thought it ended with "Goodbye Cruel World" which seemed like a fitting end. Then one day I turned the cassette over and there was more! I once loaned this cassette to a friend and when I got it back, he had used it to record his own band performing Smells like Teen Spirit over "Hey You." Fav track: Another Brick in the Wall

9) They Might Be Giants - Flood
http://www.amazon.com/Flood-They-Might-Be-Giants/dp/B000002H7V/
A few people told me they liked TMBG, including classmate JJ before she died a week before high school graduation. As a grad present, I got a gift certificate to Tower Records and bought Flood without ever hearing any of their music. They've got a sound I hadn't heard anywhere else, and that album was a good start. Fav song: Istanbul (Not Constantinople)

10) Billy Thorpe - Children of the Sun
http://www.amazon.com/Children-Sun-Billy-Thorpe/dp/B0000074G3/
Every time I'd visit my grandmother, the classic rock radio station there would play this cool song, the title track off the album, but I'd never hear it in Nashville. It was a 6 minute space-themed rock anthem. The problem was finding it. Thank you internet!

11) Chuck Jones - In Front of People
Chuck was at Lipscomb U. the same time I was. I thought he was a gifted songwriter with clever lyrics. He had a concert on campus that I went to. It was a blast. The concert was recorded and sold on CD, and I still listen to it often. He now goes by Southpaw Jones, and still makes new releases. His songs range from witty and hilarious to sad and emotional. MariLynn can't stand his music. Fav track: I'm an Adult Now.

12) Manfred Mann's Earth Band - Somewhere in Africa.
http://www.amazon.com/Somewhere-Africa-Manfred-Manns-Earth/dp/B000025A3S/
For the longest time,I knew three of their songs: Do Wah Ditty Ditty, Mighty Quinn and Blinded by the Light. I thought it was odd how all three songs sounded so different. I found this cassette and didn't listen to it for a long time, until one sunny Saturday MariLynn and I got in the car and on the spur of the moment drove a good stretch of the Natchez Trace Parkway, while we had this album playing. Since then, I've found their rock music to be on par with other classic or prog rock giants. fav track: Redemption Song

13) Huh Techno Issue
http://www.amazon.com/Techno-Issue/dp/B000BQPEMC/
I always figured I'd like electronica dance music, even though I don't dance. I stumbled upon this cd sampler to see what techno would be like. Turns out, that day we realized we both like techno music. She really liked a song called Luv Connection by Towa Tei, who was the DJ for Deee-lite. I was introduced to Electronic Behavior Network, a group that was known for making songs out of television samples. I listen to them often. fav track: Electronic Behavior Control System.

14) Fatboy Slim - You've come a Long Way, Baby
http://www.amazon.com/Youve-Come-Long-Edited-Version/dp/B00000DCEW/
MariLynn and I had already bought a few techno cds, and there were a couple of Fatboy Slim songs I liked. On our honeymoon, we ended up at a flea market in Orlando and I bought this cd. Over the next few years, I bought every cd of his (or any of his aliases) I could find, with lots of imports. I bought a cd single with a rare track from a guy in Singapore. Fav track: Rockafeller Skank

15) The White Stripes - Elephant
http://www.amazon.com/Elephant-White-Stripes/dp/B001AP11L6/
Who says modern rock music isn't any good? A lot of people, including me. There's one exception, as I heard a couple of their songs on a 2002 vacation to Dallas. They might just be the only big name modern rock group worth listening to. MariLynn can't stand them. Fav track: Seven Nation Army.

After I made the list, I realized that everything in the list is at least 7 years old. here's something newer

16) David Byrne and Brian Eno - Everything that Happens
http://www.everythingthathappens.com/
This came out not too long ago. When I was looking for ways to spend my Christmas Money, I saw they had one track for free to download, and I really liked it. For free, their website also streams all the other tracks. I was vaguely familiar with both artists but found this cd to be great, and there are multiple tracks I listen to over and over. Fav track: Home

Due to the Nature of Olives

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Yesterday, I went to the grocery store, and for dinner, I bought a Food Lion store brand self-rising supreme pizza.  As I went to take it out of the box and place it in the oven, I saw this ominous warning:

Due to the nature of olives, product may contain olive pits.

Huh?  The first thing that came to mind was when you buy certain products, like peanut butter, and it says "May contain peanuts."  I can understand why they do that.  If you've got a peanut allergy, it's very important to know.  Does anyone out there have an olive pit allergy?  A quick google search seems to say no.  Or maybe olive pits would kill us all, and that goes without saying, except nobody said it to me. (I hear apple seeds are deadly!)

So, I went and found a bottle of olives.  Does that bottle have this warning?

No.

but, of course they remove the pits with those red pimento things.

I looked in the pantry and we have a couple of bottles of Olive Oil.  Any warning?

No.

It must be a food lion thing.  Maybe that's what you get by buying generic.  You might save 75 cents over the cost of Red Baron, but you're taking a gamble there could be an olive pit on there! Harmful if swallowed! Seek medical attention immediately.

What do you want on your Tombstone?
Olive pits?  Sorry, no.

I googled the phrase "Due to the Nature of Olives" and got no results.  So that means a couple of days from now, when the next person googles that term, they'll find this blog. *waves*

I feel like starting sentences with that phrase, just for the fun of it:

Due to the nature of olives, I bought a discounted fruitcake and a Goya Champagne Cola.

Here's one my sister-in-law Sherry told me:

Due to the Nature of Olives, the economy is in the pits!

I am forced to believe that this product warning is the result of a class action lawsuit.

Due to the nature of lawyers and olives, the uniformed public must be warned about the hazards of supreme pizza! (but not the hazards of, lets say, choking on a meat-wad or eating nothing but pizza will make you fat.)

On Law & Order, I'd love to hear Sam Waterson argue a motion before a judge, "In People V. Food Lion Pizza,..."

Due to the finite nature of olives, I can't think of anything else to say.
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Saturday, February 14, 2009

Valentines for Nerds 2009

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Valentines for Nerds 2009









Valentines for Nerds 2009

Valentines for Nerds 2009

Valentines for Nerds 2009

And now for the real 2009 Valentine...

Candy Hearts: Love

If you'd like to see more, here's my 2008 Valentine's for Nerds.  My real valentine from 2008 got about 3000 hits alone this week.
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Sunday, February 08, 2009

Bad Pun Alert!

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Coal Miner's Otter

Coal Miner's Otter

As more and more cities decide upon a town animal mascot to place statues of all around, Crossville, TN has recently settled upon the Otter. I was told by the lady in the gift shop of the Crossville Depot where this is located that Otters, once common, are now near extinct in many parts of Tennessee, but not in Crossville. Coal Miner's Otter seems like such a perfect name, but alas, this is Franky. Franky represents the mining activity of Cumberland County and was donated by Franklin Industrial Materials.

Sadly, I never found a 'Welcome Back, Otter"

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Brent's Axiom of Tech Support Effectiveness:

The easier a product is to use, the tougher time tech support will have fixing it when it breaks.

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Today's goofy spam message:

From: Efcc Crime Commission [mailto:efcc_executive01@yahoo.com.co]
Subject: BE CAREFUL OF THE HUDLOOMS


(I'm not sure what a Hudloom is. I think it's either a machine that the U.S. Dept. of Housing and Urban Development uses to weave houses, or it's a quaint spelling of Hoodlums.)

¡Tengo nueva dirección de correo!

This translates to "I have new email address!" Apparently, this spammer is trying to steal business from a better scammer.
Ahora puedes escribirme a:efcc_executive01@yahoo.com.co
Translates to: Now you can write me at... except I won't.

- FROM MRS. FARIDA V.M WAZIRI TODAY INVESTIGATION ON YOUR PAYMENT FILE AND REASON FOR DELAYING YOUR PAYMENT, SINCE APPROVED, I'm already lost. PLEASE ARE YOU STILL ALIVE? No, sorry.  Try someone else.  DID YOU SIGN ANY DEED AGREEMENT IN FAVOUR OF THIS(JOHN WHEELER) TO RECIEVE  (spellcheck!) YOUR FUNDS ON YOUR BEHALF? I'm dead, and John Wheeler might be also. DO REPLY IMMEDIATELY FOR CONFIRMATION AND RECIEVE YOUR APPROVED FUND. I'll get right on that. BEST REGARDS. XOXO MRS. FARIDA V.M WAZIRI:(Chairman) Economic And Financial Crime Commission(E.F.C.C INVESTIGATION BUREAU)Email:efcc_executiveoffice_nig01@post.ro (a different address in Romania. How can I keep you people straight?
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